Eleena Jamil's

A Secret

2009-11-24T17:54:00.000-08:00

i hve a secret beneath the lies i've said to my friends. the same lies, " yeah, im okay. i shouldnt give much thought into it".

here's my story. i constantly fr almost 24/7, think of the similar thing - she loves him better than i do. she suffered enough, she hs to get back w him.

the problem is the 'him' im refering to is my boyfriend.

do i still want to be w reza? YES, I DO. eventhough we hve not come to the stage where i love you til the end shit. but i still wanna be with him.

trust me, even after countless times, i've asked him to let me go. he believes tht we shld be together, and work things out. its not for forever, i mean we dont knw it yet. only time will tell.

somehow, the ex gf's 'undying' feelings fr him disturbs me constantly! bt i used to be 'her' bfre i commit to reza.

so, some part of me, understands how she feels. if she was my friend, honest to god i would help her out. by helping her out, is tht by giving her wht she wnts, which is REZA.

but then i thought, because of her, reza hs totally chgd to a different person. he does loves you, bt he doesnt wnt to hve the type of relationship ' i'll be yours forever til my last breath' kinda thing.

i dont think reza would be fond to get bck w her and i also think tht she doesnt like the new reza as well because if she thinks tht she'll hve the reza she had known bfre, she's wrong.

tht's wht i think - not for me to decide.

All i cn do is to bersabar kerana semuanya di tangan Allah SWT

AMIN.

Oh! Reza got into the first batch NS. he'll be going on the 4th jan to sungai shit camp in selangor. thnk god its near. wont be seeing him for the first two weeks, since im leaving for a short trip to SYD on the 5th.

at least i got to send him off first, and hve a wonderful trip w my mama, cha and best friend, zehan.

my oh my where could my baby beee ?

2009-10-18T03:05:00.000-07:00

so, recently i hve been thinking abt wht's going to happen or will take place for the next 7 months frm now. as you all know, im pretty sure nt too start my college life too soon. even mama agreed on it.

i seriously hve to plan my time wisely to fill up those empty days. i am too, scared thinking wht if i am a wee bit backtrack compared to my friends. bt it's my life. decisions will only be made by me. if it happens to sucks much, then its the risk im willing to take. well, i've encountered few saying tht through decisions, it can only make you mature as yr teacher or even guidance.

yes, but after spm :

i will have :)

few body piercings
new and i would say fresh hairstyle!
shop for god knws wht
spend time w myAdam almost everyday if possible bfre he goes for NS.
learn french as it will look kick-ass! on my resume
look out for colleges in penang, johor or mybe singapore
be mama's driver since she decided on not to buy me a car
oh! get my friggin driving license
NOT to get a job
learn to cook
strt swimming again
eat healthily during weekdays and like a pig on weekends.
visit my siblings if possible. bt SYD trip is still on. hopefully
read as many books as i can
take care of my bloody body ( to hve an awesome bod yo! )
think on how to earn bloody CASH w/o working - need few strategiesssss

35 missed clls :) new record.

2009-10-08T19:47:00.000-07:00

im having sore throat at the moment. didnt go to schl. talked to my adam in the mrng. our first to be tlking at 6.47am. haha i left him 35 missed clls ystrdy night and apparently the bro used his phone. so yeahh. aiyooo why laa bro.

NOW,

i feel like writing a wish list :)

*i want to eat and never grow fat

*i want to shop beautiful dresses and bags and heels

*i want to hve skinnier legs, no tummy, bigger boobs, smaller arms and grow at least 2 'inch taller, in order to wear all those dresses.

*i want to dye my hair brown and blue and to hve soft curls

*i want to be the smartest kid, who can be able to flip through pages and at the same time, actually know about stuff.

*if its not possible, i want 6 A's for SPM tht includes english, maths, accs, history, economics, and commerce.

* i want to be able to drive now, and if daddy and ma are rich enough to buy me an alfa romeo, or a golf GTI, or mybe a sport swift. so i could drive arnd w/o troubling other parties.

*i want to get my body piercings backkk, SOON

*i want our trip to actually happen.

*i want to see my siblings and travel around the world.

*i want spm to end, FAST.

*i want 3rd parties (if you knw who i meant) to go far far awayy, bcse death is just too much to ask

*i want to actually study in states, SHHH!

*i want my family back, in this small hse, and to be all kecoh again :'[

*i want loads of money and nt to be spoiled, which is impossible

*i want to go for fashion studies and automobile if i am smart enough to do a double degreee

*i want not to be far apart frm my Adam.

last but not least,

*i want to live my own life the way i want to.

i, you mess with me, i mess with you.

2009-10-08T07:25:00.000-07:00

had a simple early dinner w mr.enza, mum was cool abt it. suprising much i must say. conclusion of the story is i'll be missing him when he goes to langkawi tmrw.

walking side by side, back at the alley may not be the most romantic moment ever. but im sure it is not to be forgotten, no doubt abt it love :)

Quote of the day :

"i need a kid to mature him"

as for me, it's vice versa yo!

lies lies lies go away, stop messing my head. stop buzzing my ears

2009-08-29T20:26:00.000-07:00

people are putting lies in my head. its hurtful to hear those crap. i chose to trust him frm the beginning and i am trusting him still. if wht i did was right, then we are even STRONGER compared how we used to be. if wht i did was a wrong step to take, probably we would end it by now.

I AM BACKKK ; nt for good

2009-08-19T02:28:00.000-07:00

So yeahh im back, just to update my beloved siblings whom are far far far away right now from my dear life here in subang.

recently, my schl had a play. more of a sketch to be exact. yeap, it is based on the utmost famous play the late P.Ramlee made, Aci Aci Buka Pintu :) i was elected to be in charge of the costumes. i hve to admit it, it wasnt as easy as i thought it would be. bt frankly, i love every part of it! :D those adrenaline rushhhh

the question is; shld i pursue in fashion? or automobile?

YEAPPPPP! SURPRISE SURPRISE, BE VERY SURPRISE!

also, quite recently i hve made a new best friend :D it took us less than half a month to figure out that we hve ALOT in common. i mean ALOT! frm something we dislike to finishing each other's sentences! weirdddddd! SOOON TO BE MINEEE :)

mr.reza adam farouk fernandez

"OPTIONS"

2009-05-16T10:41:00.000-07:00

hey there,

let me tell you something. i've found a new love. yes, LOVE. instead of loving a boy, i've found a whole new interest in make-up. yeahh. as you all knw i love colours. bright colours, rainbows, and etc. so, dealing w 'colouring' my face every weekend brings out the joy in me :)

- went to klcc. went back home to take the steering wheel lock or something like tht. bck to klcc. walked arnd. flipped through magazines to find new ideas for my prom dress. TEEHEEE ! fetched mama at auty yati/saiful's hse in beverly heights. went to pavillion. walked arnd. was sad abt not going to MAC as daddy wants to watch AKADEMI FANTASIA. was frustrated. am okay now cse i found new songs which i like at the moment for my ipod. oh! was also browsing the net for my new watch. im wanting bright watches ever since! so, might convince my siblings to buy one for me. but DOES IT BLEND TOGETHER WITH MY SKIN COLOUR ? fuck it.

i hve the tendency to be the 'only one' . i like to think myself as a unique person. i dont follow wht others are wearing. trying to AVOID tht. believe in wht i feel like wearing, instead. and i insist on having an 'one-of-a-kind' thing. i prefer not to hve wht others are having . fr example, if indie is the in-thing, im the last person to follow. unless, its on teen vogue. a lil bit of hypocrite dont you think ? mum said i hve to chnge.

sorry for my language

2009-05-15T04:22:00.000-07:00

IT'S FUCKING ANNOYING HOW THE WORLD WORKS THESE DAYSSSS !

it's true. i dont think it does things fairly especially towards me. OMG! ARGHHHH! WTF I DIDNT ASK FOR THIS! EVERYTHING MUST HVE ITS OWN OBSTACLE ! GODDDDDD!

quite recently, i live on to ths motto . it goes like this, " believe in fate, karma and love " honestly, those three things are massively important to me. i will let god decide on whtever HIS decision is. i will let HIM do the honour to get back to the one who's been cruel or lack of human sense of friendship. last but not least i will wait patiently for IT to come back into my life, yes LOVE.

but everything is going the opposite ways. the evil ones have been happier than ever. i didnt get whtevr i wanted or wht i deserve. and i am still yearning for him eventhough my feelings and senses hve been constantly pretending claiming their own freedom from HIM. NO, unfortunately, you hvent move an inch out frm my heart.

i knw i shld move on . BUT I CANT ! dont you get it ? its hard. how i wish we didnt go through everything that has happened ? but you're a two-faced liar. you're a big phony. i also do knw tht you're a good person eventhough people thinks you're as bad as hell.

seriously, i dont knw what to do.

aiming for A's

2009-05-04T03:02:00.000-07:00

today, i got my report card. HAIYOYO ! there are good and bad . omg . im scared . i failed bm, twice. bt it was barely a test ! just one essay. and i got an 'F'. aku bukanlah seorang anak melayu. nope, i hve to think positive. i hve to work hard to get better marks for my upcoming mid year exam. OH MY GODDD ! DIE LAAAA ! NO NA ! you hve to. remember, ma and lit's sacrifices for you. they send and fetch you all the way to Shah Alam, every tuesday without fail just for you to learn. INGAT SIKIT ! im writing ths and i could here ma's voice in my head. WEIRDDDD . gtg. hve to study. MUAHKS. love you all :) do take care. god knows wht's currently invading our world. bodoh punye babi !

Am i doing it right ?

2009-05-04T02:42:00.000-07:00

well something really unexpected happened over the weekends. he texted me. 'nuff said. he was apologizing and wanting to give me my bday present that he bought but he was scared. im not giving myself any compliments but i am too good to him. the reason for it is because, to be honest i still do love and care for him. foolish na. i want to help him to be a better person. foolish na. i want him to tell me everything strting frm the beginning til the end, the truth, how he felt towards me, face-to-face. FOOLISH NA. yes, i know. but i couldnt help it . i hve to knw the truth, or else it would be stuck in my head forever. because i do feel like he have 'loved' me once. mybe im wrong or hopeful bt also im nt expecting anything in return. i know he would not love me the way he is w A . im also tired of being mad, upset, crying because of it.

NOW...

im in 'good terms' with him :) just as friends. im happy that we managed to 'save' the relationship as friends not lovers. back to wht is actually bothering me now, somehow i feel awkward, jealous and at unease whenever i see them laughing or talking. i hve to get used to it right? i chose to be friends.

OH GOD ! I NEED YOU YET AGAIN. nt him, god.

a day i'll always remember

2009-04-18T20:45:00.000-07:00

of everything had happened, i pretty much was focusing on A only . he's the only person i could think of . every single day, every period of time . i couldnt change that just yet but after spending time w my closest friends, it made me realise that i have friends whom i can treat them as family . my second family of course . we shared laughters, both sweet and bad moments, we help each other out when anyone of us is in either emotional breakdown :) trouble or even favours . eventhough i lost him, i hve friends i could rely on .

- guys if you're reading ths i hope that our friendship will always be the same and how they are . thank you for everything . I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCHHHH ! :D

yesterday (180409) was tres fun ! we had our study group at adelin's hse first then we went to curve to pre-celebrate my birthday . we had dinner at tony roma's . it was heavenly delicious . the stupid jokes were definitely hilarious . oh the birthday song was so cute in a way that they were singing it really quietly cse i didnt wnt it to be tht obvious and its nt even my bday . hahaha . the last minute asking adelin for couple was definitely stressful, had to go all around curve and ikano to find a teddy bear and rose . it was a success . congrats to adelin and hadi :) all 6 of us eventually went seperate ways, omar and hafiz went for a movie, adelin and zehan went bck home, hadi and i went to rack ss15 after sending them bck . played foosball, smoked shisha, drank non-alcoholic beer at ths arab shop ( not tht bad i must say ), met hadi's friend, Faliq, played pool which im getting good at it, and was home by 3 . OMG . oh did i mention tht we got stopped by the police for driving passed the red lights ? yeap yeap . it was my fault in a way that i asked hadi to just drive since there were no cars at all . haha i guess i was wrong, IM SORRY . luckily because of his advantage of being in the (imnotallowedtosay) we managed to go off w/o any chrges . i was happy to be home . somehow, i miss my bed . haha

Thank you mie and jay for allowing ma and lit to get me the loewe purse :) i appreciate it

love,

NA :)

First day back at schl

2009-04-14T08:26:00.000-07:00

after all the drama, i have to face him, OFTEN . duh, our classes are opposite to one another . i could somehow sense that he's avoiding me . im thinking of confronting him ? no, jst talk to him first, let it slide for the first round . and then BOOM ! im gonna ask him for the truth . should i do tht ? i dont know . the reason i would wanna talk to him in the first place is that i miss him . BLOODY HELL NA ! WHAT'S WRONG WITCHU ?!

i told mie that today wasn't as fun as i thought it would be cse mybe i wasn't in the mood for it . no, i hve to be happy . i hve to focus on my studies . i have to live my life . i shouldnt let it be miserable, and full of regrets or whtsoevr .

am i up for it ? oh godd, i hope so .

to my close ones, im sorry for the whining i've made throughout my recovering process :) i feel selfish, self centered, or any characteristic tht only revolves around ME . i bet all of you must hve been tired or even sick of listening to me, talking abt him or her . or them . i'll try to shut my mouth abt everything . im gonna do good to people frm now on . i mean, im gonna 'layan' people strting frm now on . i feel the need to do so . i dont know why actually . mybe i want to study them . i sound weird . YES, I AM WEIRD HAHA

crap crap crap . blah blah blah . i love sheeps .

yours truly,

SNE3

imagine yourself

2009-04-09T21:07:00.000-07:00

imagine yourself living in a lie and that you were the last one to know . imagine, people are looking at you thinking what a pity, she was fooling herself . imagine, you thought you have him and you could depend on him, but you're not her and will never be . imagine, you thought you were doing wrong to him and also thought you were the reason this relationship didnt work out . imagine, how hurt it is that you hve to end the relationship eventhough you knew we could work this out . imagine, YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY HAVING THIS RELATIONSHIP .

i couldnt look you the same way at all . i wouldnt trust your friends and only trust mine . you're all pretenders,to be good and nice to me, just bscause im the victim here .

i couldnt accept the fact i was being lied at by everyone .
do you knw tht i feel embarassed of wht you told people about 'my mistakes', and that you're in love w someone else, you asked yr bestfriends on how to break up w me and thought you're in love w me ?

how could i not see ths cmg ?

2009-04-09T20:48:00.000-07:00

i thought it was just you and i, but no i was fooled . how could you be with me when you're in love with her ? why do you hve to do ths to me ? i've wasted my energy and tears over you . i knew you were too good to be true . but i kept telling myself tht you're different than james . after wht you did, you are far much worse than him . GOD, i thought you're frm science class you could think for yourself . and instead, you listened to yr bestfriends . even your guy friends are smarter than you are in this . this is reality honey, if you couldnt get the one you love, isnt it you hve to move on ? you're still hoping her to love you back . no other girls would want to be with you after wht you did to me .

in other way you are smart in cheating yourself, and me . wow, BRAVO dude ! call me in 50 years time, if you've gotten her love and live happily ever after with her . im nt gonna diss A in ths matter . she doesnt do anything . i dont think she knows about it . if you managed to get her in your arms, do be faithful to her only and tell her you love her and meant it . please dont do this to her or any other girls . good luck in everything syg . i hope you get to study in manchester, get A to go head over heels for you, and whtsoever .

the truth hurts

2009-04-08T22:39:00.000-07:00

#1 : i was his rebound girl, he knew he wouldnt get the chance with A
#2 : he felt weird when im around him, eventhough i was his girlfriend
#3 : he knws tht A's the only one before asking me to be his
#4 : he told EVERYONE tht he's still very much in love with A, when he was with me
#5 : he planned briefly w his bestfriends on how to let me go
#6 : he's planning to sing a song for A during prom
#7 : he hs no balls to end the relationship
#8 : he didnt even show his face today at school, but i did . even i was hurt
#9 : I WAS FOOLED THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME .
#10 : the fact that i gave you my heart, i was fooled by everyone, you made me look bad, all the shit you told me were ALL BIG FAT LIES

i wish it wouldnt hve to come to an end

2009-04-08T02:46:00.000-07:00

If love was a bird then we wouldn't have wings
If love was the sky we'd be blue
If love was a choir, you and I could never sing
cause love isn't for me and you
If love was an Oscar, you and I could never win
cause we could never act out our parts
If love is the bible, then we are lost in sin
Because it's not in our hearts

So why don't you go your way,
and I'll go mine
Live your life
And I'll live mine
Baby, you'll do well
And I'll be fine
cause we're better of seperated

If love was a fire then we have lost the spark
Love never felt so cold
If love was a light then we're lost in the dark
Left with no one to hold
If love was a sport, we're not on the same team
you and I are destined to lose
If love was an ocean, baby, we are just a stream
cause love isn't for me and you

why don't you go your way,
and I'll go mine
Live your life
And I'll live mine
Baby, you'll do well
And I'll be fine
cause we're better of seperated

I know we had some good times
except for now, gotta say goodbye
you know I love you
I can't deny
Can't say we didn't try to make it work for you and I

I know it hurts so much
But it's best for us
Somewhere along this wide new moon, we lost the trust
So I walk away, so you don't have to see me cry
It's killing me so, why don't you go

So why don't you go your way,
and I'll go mine
Live your life
And I'll live mine
Baby, you'll do well
And I'll be fine
cause we're so much better of seperated

im sorry we couldnt make it

080409

when i sneeze, my stomach hurts

2009-04-03T07:09:00.000-07:00

so, yeahh . the headline is so true . it does . nt only my stomach, my muscles between my legs are in pain too ! arghh . why do i hve to be so bloody heavy to run or even long jump ? PATHETIC isnt it ?

well i've ought to be pretty damn athletic, to PASS running for 100m, long jump and shot putt . ohh, im good :) haha . bt someone else is much better . haih . im hoping to jump well ths monday . it's the FINALS *gasp* wish me luck guys .

why oh why do you hve to do ths to me ? it's all happening all over again . we hve yet to wait and see . i aint giving up . im expecting the same for you . hopefully .

HEARTS, NA :)

the beans eventually spilled

2009-03-31T10:01:00.000-07:00

as you guys have known of my belly piercing, well yesterday literally everyone knows . including mama and lit . the story goes like this...

during mie's 'comeback', i went out bra and panties shopping w her . i bought a pair of lingerie frm pierre cardin . im nt sure of the material but they are pretty . i, eventually, wore 'um yesterday as i was too darn lazy to wear a singlet . i mean, you cant really see the bra beneath my bj kurung . after schl, bfre going to tuition, i went to mama's room to show her my new bra . oh, did i mention my boobs look really good in it ? seriously :) WITHOUT even thinking of my belly piercing, i pull up my top like nobody's business . immediate response frm ma . she asked me to remove it and throw it away . she strtd asking me questions like when did i pierce it, where, with who, bla bla bla .

-

so, today she told lit about it . then, lit asked me about it . and yes, admit it directly at his face . see, no lying . he said he was very dissapointed in me for doing so . he also said tht if i do not clean up my acts, i will be much worse and hard to tolerate advises . shit im having a bloody dilemma . if i be super good like they expect me to be, i'll be brain-dead before my spm . bt if i follow my own rules and my own desire, i'll dissapoint them even more, much much more .

i've seen the look of his face tht he's dissapointed in me . i dont want that . he said he trusted all of his kids, and now, i doubt i hve it still . i dont want that .

i hve to set my mind properly, clean up my acts, and study for SPM . im nt happy about it .

-

syg came bck frm london last sun :) he came to school, with a Harrods bag full of souveniers .
*two tshirts
*two key chains - with a letter E !
*a glass eiffel tower - or plastic ? not sure

im so happy ! most of it bcse of his thought of buying for me, less on the prize .

I LOVE YOU SYG

yesterday was a disaster

2009-03-29T05:11:00.001-07:00

IM SORRY MIE,
im sorry for ruining yr last day w ma and lit . i knw it wasnt appropriate for me to do so . it's just tht i've been trapped at schl, tuition and our home for like a week . to me, it's BLOODY BORING, honestly . so, i followed my instinct to go to curve . also, im sorry for raising my voice when you called me regarding my shoe . i was just nervous, and scared tht ma will pop up the question again and tht, i hve to lie for the second time .

IM SORRY TO WHOM I USED THIER NAMES FOR MY COVER,
i didnt mean to . i was anxious when mama asked me, so i accidentally said yr names . again, im truly sorry .

LAST BUT NOT LEAST TO MAMA AND LIT,
Im sorry for yesterday, i knw i shld tell both of you where was i going and with whom . I knw if i ask you directly, i will get a definite NO . i didnt think of other people's concern during the time . im sick of lying to both of you . to me, lying is exhausting . trust me, you'll hear dissapointments coming out frm my mouth strting frm now on . as it is the truth .

-
after tlkg through w jay, he advised me to confront ma and lit on my misbehave . Ma, Lit and i successfully understood each other . ALHAMDULILLAH fr tht . ma knew i was lonely so, the only crowd i could turn to is my friends . well, her assumption was true . i hate to admit it but yes, i am lonely . similar to wht i've gone through during end of last year . i promised syg i wont touch a stick no more . i hve to admit it was HARD for me to achieve so while those guys puffing 'um directly at my face . thank you guys, really appreciated it . PFFT ! temptations were surrounding me, greatly . and yet, i didnt even take one . i am proud of myself

i hate for the fact tht i was left being alone . i hate being trap at a place for more than 3 days without going out . schl and tuitions are exception in the term of 'going out ' . i love hving fun . i love to hve no boundaries . i love being adventurous .

by following my instinct, i'll ended up hurting them with full of dissapointments . this is not how they brought me up .

Here comes GIANT iMACCCCCC :D

2008-11-15T21:53:00.000-08:00

hey guys . some of you, may probably were informed abt our new iMAC ! yesss . daddy feel in love the moment the salesperson, named valerie, explained to him abt ths 20 inches iMac . WOAHHH . After all of my talkings and praising abt iMac, he listened to Valerie . hmph . kesian i . it all started when mama wanted to buy the protecter screen and a cover for her iPhone . then, daddy walked arnd and BAMMM ! he came to us talking abt the iMac . hahaha . so, we went to lunch first . yeah yeah i was hungry . nana kann :P we ate at Zen and he still kept on telling tht iMac is worth buying . hmmm . after Zen, we went to popular cse ma and lit wanted to buy some notebooks for haj . AND DO YOU KNW WHT ? i got stopped by the macha guard . and he was accusing me for not paying ! wht the fuck weiii . slh the cashier faggot for not taking out the tag . SHHEESHH . godd mann . im not a bloody shoplifter la deiiii !

after the chaos, we went to machines to buy the mac .

daddy paid for :

iMac 20" : rm 5199
Office Mac 2008 : rm619
AppleCare protect : rm99
Beelan iMac (keyboard cover) : rm9
ipod Nano 4GB : rm529 - FREE
speck for the computer (cover for the comp ) : m168

KA - CHINGG ! KA-CHINGG! *i love sound effects*

TOTAL : RM7173

Discount : rm510

End TOTAL : RM6663

Paid : RM6595

Rebate : Rm 68

any enquires or questions , ASK LIT ! :)

To Jay, since you're the only one yang takde iPod . You deserves the 4GB iPod :D the iPod is like mine and mama's . silver in colour . INFORM MA OR LIT ALRIGHT !

and for miee, i think im ready to confront HIM . wish me luck babehhh . bt one of friends kene teman me jumpe him laa . of course

lovin' Apple :D,

SWEEEETT NEWS ! READ ALL ABOUT IT ! :D

2008-11-12T23:04:00.000-08:00

hey guys ! how are you ? believe it or not, im busy following mama arnd . today's venue is at taipan . we went to tmnet (pay bills), then to maxis ( chge my sim crd ), later to paul ( OUR phone were badly sick, mine tak leh nk on, mama's tak leh use her keypad ) . end up i dpt 3310 nye phone for exchange . aslkan bleh on phone . we hd lunch at d'fros nasi beriyani . FYI, it's owned by aunty dato' or Datuk faridah . arwah's and khai's mum . cha you may not recognise her mybe . bt im sure k.emi and jay wouldnt hve prob . THE FOOD WAS AWESOMEEEE . sedap laa . im nt a nasi beriyani eater, so if i makan and its nice, it must be one hella good meal . mummy aka aunty sabariyah and ehsan joined us later . they brought goodies for mama . GUESS WHAT ?! an iPhone 3G ;D . apparently, mama asked iman to buy it at new zealand . for 3K riggit malaysia . mak kita dh advance weiiii ! haha .

here's prove babeh !

seriously best laa . tekan sini sana . haha . tht's just not all . deary mama wanted a mp3 for her to listen during her haj . as a lady, and hve not yet menopause, she hs her period due between the haj journey . so, she wants to fill her non praying time by ' berzikir' . we went to ah meng on tuesday to find the most simplest mp3 ever . bt we ended up buying an iPod Nano 4G . just like mine . and not like yours cha :P you're wondering why Nano ? bcse, simon ( fotokem's owner ) doesnt recommend mama to buy the normal ones becse its not guaranteed tht it cn be uploaded frm the cds she just bought . as i hve uploaded my iPod with tons of cds, and managed to play it on iPod, so the definite choice would be apple . which apple is another question . obviously she was looking at the cheapest iPod ever . bt the cheapest is shuffle . shuffle would be a very suitable choice for small amounts of songs . unfortunately, its unabling her to see wht surah is playing . she wants something with lcd cover . Nano hs one and considered the cheapest with lcd .

here's the prove also !

the one beside her iPhone .

i would say tht ths week is mum's apple goodies week ! haha . so i guess that's the sweeeeeeet news :D later tonight, we're going to aunty faridah's restaturant for dinner . ths time we're bringing daddy along . she wants him to come along . Bold move ! she as in not your mother tau . then, myba we're going to baba's house to check out shaqir's new FOOSBALL TABLE ! not small ones . aunty rose said it's like the one we played at sunway hotel the other day . it's BIGGGG and it's his bday gift . he's ten !!!! hope we get the chance to play it . when you guys are bck here in msia in future, there's a lot to catch up huh ? LOL . it must be suck-y to study abroad and missing out on things . bt you guys will get something out of it ape . better future for all of you !

will post again with new pictures :D love you guys load ! online later kay . toodles . take care

what a day !

2008-10-28T03:30:00.000-07:00

hello everyone :) how are your day today ? fine ? mine was terri-bleee alright! haha . well, i woke up late today as there's still a holiday for me due to deepavali celebration . my day started w a 'tiff' w mama . let's just say tht everything mcm x kene jee today . so, both of us mcm mudi . everything eased off on the way to jaring . dh okay, i guess .

after lunch, we went to pay all the bills and mama decided to go to tabung haji . i had to go home and put on decent clothes and tudung before going there . tutup aurat katakan . hmm . ohh, i had fun wearing tudung, seriously . i also took a picture of me wearing tudung :D

sry la rmbt mcm terkeluar . beginners laaa !

then blk rumah, kemas all of your things laa . hmm, honestly, malas gile okayy . found PS2 in the closet . decided to play it during my holidays :) im gonna be one of the gamers , yeahhhh ! haha . well, tonight, mama and lit are going to aqiqah aunty faridah nye ank kt blakang rumah . i think yr friend nyee niece/nephew kott cha . i hve no clue who it is for . adam and family are cmg w bibi too . she's here for medical check-up tmrw .

oh, here are the photos fuss took during our outing the other day :)

on hendersons bridge :) sumpah cool !

i heart ths picture !

they cll ths pose 'formal'

at nazrin's, arab street :)

til then, take care guys . i miss you guys weyhhh ! :)

love,
NAAAAA

IM BACKKKKKKK :D

2008-10-27T08:37:00.000-07:00

well, the title says it all :)

and it's trueee, im bck :) haha . bonjour me ziblingss ! i hope you guys are great . we are all fine here, bt letih sket blk frm spore . i've decided to post abt our recent agenda . cse, i mcm dh lupe jee wht happened for the past 2 weeks . hmm, i only could remember studying for my finals . gosh, it was super hard ! shit gileee babi . enough w my finals, let's tlk abt last weekend :D

lst friday, i had a sleepover here at our hse ! imagine, 5 girls sleeping at our front living room . mcm sardins jeee, bt hot and not smelly ones of course. lol . the sleepover was to celebrate nab's and sqeen's bday . fyi, they are twins tauu . well, sort of :) haha . we ate at italliannies, watched 'house bunny' and had a quick drink at taj . we had to cme back before midnight cse one of our friends wanted to make a suprise for nab . mind you, sqeen couldnt join us . she had to celebrate w her family .

they all went bck, before we started our journey to spore. unfortunately, we had to stop by rembau before going to spore. it was lit's friend's son's kenduri kahwin . sheesh . fyi, it wasnt 'fun' at all . arnd 4, we strted our journey :D arrived orchard hotel arnd 9 smething . then, dinner kat newton circus . waduhhh, mkan byk gile . sedapppp kott !

the next day, we wlked arnd orchard before going to ami zacky's hse . bought a knit-dress and a pair of ear rings at top shop :)

after eating lunch w the uncles and aunties, i went out w fuss, kak ju, wawan and abg fuss, farhan . it was FUN weyhh ! seriously . we went to vivocity, lepak sane skjp sbb nk hanta abg fuss keje . then pegi hendersons wave which was super cool . then gi shisha kat nazrin somewhere arnd arab street . fyi, in spore, you hve to be freagin 18 to shisha. check I.D plak tuu . wtf kann ? by law, im nt a sporean . so, i hentam jee shisha! bubblegum plak tuu . sedapp . hehe . seriously best ahh lepak dgn dorang . it made me misses you guys . sumpah x tipu . ma lit and i were seperated . parents layan parents . anak layan anak . haha, yeahh . i came back arnd 2 am ! fuhhhh .

the day nk blk, we went for our last shopping trips. ya allah, penat gile kott . imagine frm orchard hotel, jln smpi takashimaya(taka) pstu pegi wisma atria, then gi taka again, then pegi wisma atria blk . gara-gara nk cr cha nyee platform shoe ! x pe, at last i saw one. lawa gile, and quite cheapp !

isnt she a beauty? :)

oh bought a 70's long sleeve shirt for you mieeee

both frm MNG :)

after shopping, we decided to go bck home, subang . arrived 9 something after a very long jam kt seremban . alright then, i'll post again soon ! take care you guys ! i love you guys and rinduu jgk !

xoxo,
nana :)

RAYA PHOTOS :D

2008-10-02T00:13:00.000-07:00

the mommmyss :)

Faiz and his gf, kafie, i think :S

we are creative !
:)

HAHAHAHA

the girls AGAIN :)

US camwhoring

girlss :)

she's all grown up ;) *tears
LOL

Aziz M's angels

my baju raya :)

WILL UPLOAD MORE :]

SELAMAT HARI RAYA :)

2008-10-01T11:03:00.000-07:00

gosh after a month of fasting, we're at last having the most important event of the year, HARI RAYA ! arhhhhh :) haha . my first raya alone . it's kayy i cn deal with that . i hve to be strong kannn ? you guys ponnn ! BE STRONG BABEHHHH ! lol :P

we woke up, and the boys/men were all gone for raya prayers . and obviously, the girls/ladies were busy getting pretty, lovely, beautiful, marvellous etc etc . thnk godd, everything was fineeee for me . good hair day, an okayy make up ( which i did it myself ) , perfect outfit . tlkg abt outfit, my bj kurung wasnt jahit w the lining . so, i hd so much trouble getting the right colour tube tht go with the bj kurung ! haihhhh . luckily i found it :D

wahhh, everyone cantik cantik belaka laaa . SJF family was the first to arrive . Aziz M's family x kira laa, dorang tido situ . oh yeahhh, and Ashikin M's too . not to forget, Azrin M .

2. SAR's family
3. Azman M's family (except for zarul)
4. Azhar M's family
5. Azmi M's family (including faiz and gf)
6. Azlan M's family ( excluding pak ngah and tasha)

and paling lambat was
7. Azri M's family (except for aisyah) arrived @ 1 something

we had takbir raya again with everyone there except for unc ri and the fam . honestly kann, it was so sadd when i look at daddy . he was crying, sobering over the fact tht you guys were away . i felt like crying too !! mama was in tears too . lagi - lagi mase, lit had to bace doa . when he doa for anak - anak, he couldnt move on . aww, kesian daddy . NVM, next year ! we raya together hopefully boleh . Insyallah .

ikut adat, we bersalaman starting from the eldest to mok chu . it wasnt as fun though as previous years . everyone wasnt as cheerful or kecoh ! haha . fun fact : nora didnt get duit raya, bcse she started her career . dnt get a job tht early ! no duit raya !

we ate and ate and ate and ate ! ada, smbl sotong, serunding, ketupat, lemang, nasii impit, lodeh, rendang ayam, rendang daging, rendang udang, and lots more . the mommys, daddys, children were busy chatting away . we took photos too ! YEAYYYY !

it all ended at arnd 5 something . everyone was so tired . kesian...

later, we had dinner jst to finish off all of the lauk . well, as usual, the subang - ians jee yg dtg . EXPECTED . fyi, we're sleeping over at baba's hse again tonight . i'll update you guys later . toodles, love and misses all of you ! xoxoxoxo :))

p/s : photos update later laa kayy hehe

HAIR-LESS ME . hahaha

2008-09-29T14:38:00.000-07:00

day : RAYA's eve
time : currently it's 5.53am

Bonjour me ziblingss ! hope all three of you are in good shape for raya :D lately, everyone hs compliment on my body shape *weird* haha adik korang dh hott dh, mmg x ahh kot !

GUESS WHAT ???

spot the mighty diff!

IT'S THE UPPER LIPS
no, i didnt shave it and yes, i WAX-ed it !

bloody hell, it was painful, jusst for awhile :) then im fine as usual . wah, nasib baik i x menangis okayy ! bt the person who did it for me, was awesome . she drew my attention away while she pull it off . jst imagine you stick a plaster on yr upper lips and pull it fast ! it was only 15 mins babe ! then, after tht im off to see you knw who *blushing* while waiting for mama get her facial done . unfortunate for me, i couldnt do it to avoid irritation . so, im doing it today ! :)

after facial, we did some groceries and off bck home . i saw mok chu in mak uda's hse . so, i quickly unload all our stuff and locked myself up in my room . i DONT wnt to confront her . i guess you were right k.emi, she's celebrating raya at putraheights . bloody hell, how am i gonna salam her .

mama was angry with me for avoiding her, i mean SO ! i hve my rights whether or not to be nice to her . im forced to go to tok daddy's hse for buka puasa . i guess aunt's rose kids were forced too ! haha, i buat lwk, ketawa laa :D i jst salam mok chu to give her some not so sincerely RESPECT . hd dinner and all, was totally bored then came tja and kaklong fabby! YEAYYYYY !

GODDDD, do you knw tht when i wanna salam her mase nk blk, she made it as if i wasnt there ! OIIT, sape yg menghilang selama nie ?! i ke you ? i dh hulur tgn, she made me wait , i was right in front of for god's sake !! just hulur je laa kan, mcn i nk diri dpn die being all excited tht she came bck ! boo-hoo !

FYI, yr daddy hs become such a sport when it comes to go out to mamak . he enjoys bringing SAR's kids out for roti canai, let's see, last week itself we went to 5 diff types of mamak in 5 days, WOW! and today lagi, wah, k.emi cpt timang anak ! LAUGH OUT LOUDDDD

currently, we're staying over at baba's hse . at least for 3-4 days . yeahhh, i wonder if kakak is going to be here for the cooking prep . hopefully so . imagine i'll be a freagin helper there w 20 kilos of sotong . ERRLACKK! im going off , talk to you later soon . i love you all, xoxo .

SELAMAT HARI RAYA, MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN :)

MY RAYA CLOTHES . teehee

2008-09-29T09:51:00.000-07:00

new blouse
frm : miss selfridge

new jeans :)

fcuk blouse :)

raya shoe :)

i'm BLOGGING

2008-09-28T08:45:00.000-07:00

Selamat Datang kakak kakak dan abg ku ! (just in case, you guys got too caught up w yr own self-languages)

guess what ? im blogging :D it is pretty obvious . how i got the idea of blogging ? well, i feel the need to let you guys knw abt things bck in msia . i baik kannnn :P haha .

COUNTDOWN TO RAYA : 2 days

CURRENT MOOD : nt in the 'raya' mood

Today, the 28th sept

our day started w having sahur at mcd ! nt bad at all our parents weyhhh . LOL so yeah, then went bck home, sleep and i woke up late . as usual . saw mama and lit packing your stuff, jay . thnks to them and me . i did two boxes, they did two also, fair and square . haha . okayy, i jahat . an unfortunate day, mama decided to rearrange our furnitures arnd . and mind you tht kakak x ada ! DE-HORROR ! hahaha lit and me had to be 'kakak' for a day. oh yeah, jay, yr long lost best friend *nana's giggling* HAMDI couple nagn kwn aina cousin okay ! *nana's laughing histerically* after the laughing stops, we got ready to go shopping again for my 'raya' shoe . thnk you vry much cha ! :P we went to the mall first, to get our baju raya :D AT LAST ! kalau x, x raya laa i . yeah, then we decided to go to ou . AGAIN . fyi, we went there ystrdy . i bought my raya shoe ! WEEEEEE ! and a blouse frm fcuk . cool weyh . we ate at delicous, and it was DELICIOUS ! mama met one of her 'miri' friends . how odd.. *sarcastically* now, we're at baba's hse . they're watching our jakarta trip, videos taken by baba . i hve to go now . toodles korang ! i miss you guys ALOT ! ILYSM all three of you guys!

xoxo, yr hugable sister :)

p/s : i call korang nape x angkat !! eeeee, mengade .

na's vocabulary

ilysm - i love you so much